Rhyme scheme is ABAB CDDC EFE FGG and the meter is irregular dactylic with verses of greatly varying lengths. This is the first of three Gedankenlyrik concluding the first part of Die Sonette an Orpheus. The verses vary in length from hexamter to 15 syllables. The syntax is more that of a reportage than that of a poem.
Sollen wir unsere uralte Freundschaft,[1] die großen
Should we shun our ancient friendship, the great
niemals werbenden Götter,[2] weil sie der harte
never wooing gods, because the hard
Stahl, den wir streng erzogen, nicht kennt verstoßen[3]
steel, which we have under pressure trained, does not recognize them,
oder sie plötzlich suchen auf einer Karte?[4]
or to suddenly search for them on a map.
Diese gewaltigen Freunde, die uns die Toten
These mighty friends, who from us the dead
nehmen, rühren nirgends an unsere Räder.[5]
take, at no time touch our wheels.
Unsere Gastmähler haben wir weit--,[6] unsere Bäder,
Our communal meals [with them] are distant, our baths,
fortgerückt,[7] und ihre uns lang schon zu langsamen Boten[8]
yanked away, and we overtake their messagers who take too much time for us.
überholen wir immer. Einsamer nun auf einander
always, More lonely now, upon each other
ganz angewiesen, ohne einander[9] zu kennen,
totally dependent, without knowing each other,
führen wir nicht mehr die Pfade[10] als schöne Mäander,[11]
we do not tred the same paths as happy meanderers,
sondern als Grade.[12] Nur noch in Dampfkesseln brennen
but as straight goal directed ones. Only in the boilers still burns
die einstigen Feuer und heben die Hämmer,[13] die immer
the former fire and the hammers are being lifed, as always, the constantly
größeren.[14] Wir aber nehmen an Kraft ab, wie Schwimmer.[15]
greater ones, We, however, are waning in strength, like swimmers.
Sollen wir unsere uralte Freundschaft, die großen
Should we reject primeval friendship to those great
niemals werbenden Götter, weil sie der harte
gods who never court our favor since they regard
Stahl, den wir streng erzogen, nicht kennt, verstoßen
not the hard steel which we rigorously create,
oder sie plötzlich suchen auf einer Karte?
or should we search them suddenly out on a land card?
Diese gewaltigen Freunde, die uns die Toten
These our most mighty friends, who make disappear
nehmen, rühren nirgends an unsere Räder.
the dead, brush nowhere near against our orbit,
Unsere Gastmähler haben wir weit--, unsere Bäder,
Our friendly banquets are afar --, our communal bathing quit,
fortgerückt, und ihre uns lang schon zu langsamen Boten
yanked away, and we overtake their taking too much time courier
überholen wir immer. Einsamer nun auf einander
as we always do. Lonelier now and totally on each other
ganz angewiesen, ohne einander zu kennen,
dependent, without getting to know one another,
führen wir nicht mehr die Pfade als schöne Mäander,
we no longer follow the paths as leisurely meanders,
sondern als Grade. Nur noch in Dampfkesseln brennen
but as straight arrows. Only still in steaming boilers
die einstigen Feuer und heben die Hämmer, die immer
do the eternal flames burn and lift the hammers,
größeren. Wir aber nehmen an Kraft ab, wie Schwimmer.
constantly greater ones. We however lose strength, like swimmers.
[1] Sollen wir unsere uralte Freundschaft: The modal auxiliary "sollen" does not find its resolution until the end of verse 3 with "verstoßen.
[2] die großen niemals werbenden Götter: An opposition as an Epanorthosis made of an extended adjectivial construction using both the adjective "großen" modified by the adverb "niemals," both modifying the present participle of the verb "werden" modifying the plural noun "Götter." In spoken and normal poetic German the normal construction would be "die großen Götter, die niemals werben. . ." Up to now in Part I of the Sonette such a construction is rare with two examples of constructions with two modifiers such as "bei dem grob gehemmten Galopp" in Sonnet XX and "eines dem Menschen unendlichen Weins" in Sonnet VII. This makes clear that this sonnet is more of a "Gedankenlyrik" than the preceeding exemplified by the much longer line length approximating a very irregular hexamater. Epanorthosis, pl. -ses: The rephrasing of an immediately preceding word or statement for the purpose of intensification, emphasis or justification.
[3] weil sie der harte/Stahl, den wir streng erzogen, nicht kennt, verstoßen: The first three verses of this quartet consist of a question beginning with "Sollen wir. . ." and ending with "verstoßen." The direct object is the extended anjectivial construction explicated in the preceding footnote. The reason for the "verstoßen" is the subject of this footnote. This complicated construction results in two verbs "kennt" and "verstoßen" separated by a comma plus the two commas surrounding the relative clause "den wir streng erzogen. [One wonders why Rilke did not consequently also use a further extended adjectivial construction such as "weil sie den harten, von uns streng erzogenen Stahl nicht kennt" to avoid the superfluity of commas.] The only other sonnet with three commas in a line in Part I is Sonnet XIII, verses 13 & 14, each of which are examples of a series of adjectives or nouns respectively: "doppeldeutig,sonnig, erdig, hiesig --;/O Erfahrung, Fühlung, Freude--, riesig!" Both of these verses are rhetorically enhanced using polysyndeton. Polysyndeton: The repetition of conjunctions, normally "and."
[4] oder sie plötzlich suchen auf einer Karte: The laconic alternative to our shunning the former gods. Note the hyberaton in the placing of "suchen" after "plötzlich" instead of at the end of the sentence thereby giving it more emphasis. Normal would be "oder sie plötzlich auf einer Karte suchen?" There is no comma [thankfully] before "oder" because "suchen" is also governed by "Sollen wir." Therefore it is not a new clause. Hyberbaton: A figure of speech using deviation from normal or logical word order to procuce an effect.
[5] rühren nirgends an unsere Räder: Alliteration of the "r" sound in "rühren," "unseRe and "Räder." The accusative is here used with "an" before "Räder" The fourth definition of "rühren" in Brockhaus is: "an es, an ihm, berühre es, treffe darauf: er rührte nur leise an den Vorhang. . ." Although Brockhaus indicates the possibility of the dative, it only gives an example of the accusative. An English approximation would be "brushes against" instead of "rests against." The image of the gods nowhere brushing against our wheels suggests that this image be an ironic allusion to the German expression "Er is das fünfte Rad am Wagen."
[6] Unsere Gastmähler haben wir weit--,: The first of a series of examples of our distancing ourselves from the gods. The use of the Gedankenstrich after the first comma is used "als Zeichen der Pause" [Brockhaus] or as the name itself indicates "to think it over slowly." Gedankenstrich: A long horizontal bar which is longer than a hyphen and is used to separate a strong or parenthetical interruption from the rest of the sentence.
[7] unsere Bäder,/fortgerückt: The comma here serves as a replacement for the verb "sein." "unsere Bäder sind fortgerückt." Another example of multiple commas in one verse. Also note the Assonance of "Räder," "Gastmähler" and "Bäder" in verses 6 and 7. Assonance: Resemblance of sound, especially of the vowel sounds in words.
[8] ihre uns lang schon zu langsamen Boten: Along with being another extended adjectivial construction with five modifiers ["ihre" "uns" "lang" "schon" "zu" and "langsamen"] the use of "lang" as an adverb and "langsam" as an adjective creates a polyptoton which is The repetition of the same word or root in different grammatical functions or forms. Corresponding to the lengthy comparison, the line length of this verse extends to 15 syllables compared to the 12 or 13 of the preceding verses and extends to the next verse which also has 15 syllables.
[9] Einsamer nun auf einander/ganz angewiesen, ohne einander: Note the repeated use of "ein" in the repetition of "einander" and in "einsam" to exaggerate our loneliness without the ancient gods. This is heightened by the assonance of the "an" sound in "einander," "ganz" and the "an" in "angewiesen." Assonance: Resemblance of sound, especially of the vowel sounds in words.
[10] führen wir nicht mehr die Pfade: In this perhaps most unpoetic of the sonnets in Part I the few poetic touches such as the semi-alliteration of "führen and "Pfade" stand out. Alliteration: The repetition of the sound of an initial consonant or consonant cluster in stressed syllables close enough to each other for the ear to be affected.
[11] Mäander: Note the in this Rhyme the same two syllables "ander" rhyme with themselves. This is known in English as identical rhyme. This sonnet sets several precedents: The first usage of complicated extended anjectivial constructions, the first with extended, irregular line lengths and the first with an imperfect rhyme. The word "Mäander" as a noun refers to the sinous winding of a river coming from the river "Maeander" in Turkey known for its winding course. The word itself is also used as a verb in German being "mäandern" and in English as "to meander." Identical Rhyme: In a perfect rhyme the preceding consonants (or consonant and vowel) must be different with the sounds thereafter identical, but an identical rhyme has the same preceding consonant or vowel.
[12] Grade: According to Brockhaus "grade" is the "alltägliche Form von "gerade." There is a German word "der Grad" with the plural "Grade" which means "degree." Grammatically viewed, this inappropriate word is correct, but it appears that Rilke used the conversational form of "gerade" as a noun and treated the "e" on "Grade" as if it were the plural, similar to the plural of the word "der Grad."
[13] Nur noch in Dampfkesseln brennen/die einstigen Feuer und heben die Hämmer: In this somewhat convuluted construction the fire's burning causes the several steam boiler to raise the hammers; therefore, "Nur noch in Dampfkesseln brennen/die einstigen Feuer" serves as the plural subject for the action of lifting the hammers.
[14] die immer größeren: A distanced parallelism with the first two verses "die großen niemals werdenden Götter" using the same word first in the normal form and then in the comparative form. Also an Epanorthosis, since the hammers are being further explicated. Parallelism: The repetition of identical or similar syntactic patterns in adjacent phrases, clauses or sentences. Epanorthosis, pl. -ses: The rephrasing of an immediately preceding word or statement for the purpose of intensification, emphasis or justification.
[15] Wir aber nehmen an Kraft ab, wie Schwimmer: Another distant parallelism with verse 4 which has the same rather prosaic and thereby ironic commentary on the frailty of our communication with the gods and then on our lack of strength to carry out this communication. The concluding words "wie Schwimmer" are an example of an Ellipsis, since the conclusion "wie Schwimmer an Kraft abnehmen" is left to us to finish. Note also the somewhat extended Assonance of "heben" in the middle of verse 13 and "nehmen" in the midst of verse 14 which is also an unusual form of internal rhyme. Internal Rhyme: Not rhyming words solely at line end, but also internally or internal words rhyming with words in another line. Parallelism: The repetition of identical or similar syntactic patterns in adjacent phrases, clauses or sentences. Ellipsis, plural ellipses: 1.a. The omission of a word or phrase necessary for a complete syntactical construction, but not necessary for understanding.